Ellie Fawn T.

In the next few weeks baby will double (his) weight and add inches to (his) length. Baby is about 5 inches long and 3.5 to 4 ounces. Toenails have even started to grow. There's a lot happening inside as well. For example, the heart is now pumping about 25 quarts of blood each day, and this amount will continue to increase as baby continues to develop. "Soooo Big!"

This is baby's first collection of stuffed animals. Alice gave us the yellow elephant. After seeing our blog, she put some thought into it and decided that if it's a girl we should name her "Ellie Fawn T." No, of course we wouldn't, but quite an original thought! The brown puppy is from Gwen (Mommy was cuddling with it this morning). Thank you both.

The chenille teal throw is my mom's from her bed as a teenager. I was looking in the closet for a blanket to throw over the rocker when I came across this. It's the perfect color to go with the baby's room and is really beautiful. We discussed the possibility of incorporating this fabric into a blanket for Baby T.; that would be quite a special piece to hand down to our child. The rocker was my Grandma Martha's. I'm not sure if it will stay in our room or the baby's, but it's sure nice to have.

MOOOO

We had our 16 week appointment today. It was pretty uneventful. We listened to fetal heart tones; baby's heart rate is about 150. I'm growing at the expected rate, and we will schedule our next appointment for four weeks from now at which time we will also schedule an ultrasound. (Yeah!!)

I continue to feel well, although I wish I was sleeping through the nights. I sleep so lightly and there's really nothing I can do about it. Plus the trips to the bathroom don't help; I thought that was supposed to stop by now... I'm getting up at least once to the bathroom and my internal alarm wakes me at 4am with a full bladder. I try to ignore it and sneak it that extra hour of sleep before I have to get up for work, but it's frustrating. Oh well, it's all for a great reason!

I'm really excited. Sandy and Vince gave us their pump- it's a HUGE cost savings, and it's a great model. The dual pump should have these puppies emptied out in about 20 minutes- perfect for when I return to work. The greatest part of the exchange was when my nephews, Shane and Branden, asked me "What's this thing for?". I answered, "it milks the cow" (thinking that would be way over their heads). And with that, Shane replied with a smirk on his face, "And you're the cow, right?!" We were cracking up.

Movement!

I'm really excited! I felt the baby move yesterday for the first time! Christian and I were waiting to be seated at our favorite breakfast place- Egg Harbor Cafe, in Geneva, when I felt two short pulses similar to what it would feel like if I got a vibrate alert from my phone for a text message. I felt them on the lower right side of my abdomen. I got really excited, but to be sure, I checked my phone to see if it was a text. No new messages, no missed calls. I didn't feel anything for the rest of the day; even though I was sure it was the baby I still had my doubts. But then I felt it again today while I was at Jewel! Yeah!! Hooray for baby T!!

I checked on baby's heartbeat this morning. The rate was 144, and very clear. I was midway through the heart rate when the baby moved and I lost it. But I moved the doppler over about an inch and a half and was able to hear it again.

It's hard to believe baby is four inches from crown to rump... Baby's scalp hair pattern has been determined by now and can turn (his) head, open its mouth, and press its lips together. This month we expect to see the most rapid growth yet! I'm not sure if we'll have another ultrasound at our visit on the 28th, but it sure would be nice!!

We went browsing in Geneva yesterday after breakfast and found some really adorable paintings for the nursery. So I believe we have determined the theme of the room, but we can 't purchase any paintings until we know if it's a boy or a girl... there weren't any gender neutral items for what we like so I'm going to call over there today to find out if the paintings I found can be ordered in say... 25 weeks or so!

Oh!... I had another baby dream last night. Despite the fact that Christian and I came to the realization this week that this very well could be a girl, it was still a boy in my dream. He had such a round little head and beautiful face!! (He was probably about 9 months old in my dream). He even looked like a Polpino!! I should mention that we are certainly not hoping for one sex over another, its just that all along we've both said we think it's a boy while most everyone else thinks it's a girl... 'Till this weekend when we talked about how our certainty of it being a boy is diminishing... We'll see, won't we!

Thank you to our friend Dawn for lending me some maternity clothes. The capris are especially helpful to get me through the next few warm months without spending too much money!

Go USA!

We just can't get enough of the Olympics! As I was cleaning yesterday, Christian presented me with my gold medal and requested I put on my swimming gear for a photo shoot. (Come on, I know you all do this stuff, I'm the only one willing to admit it!) Our gym has a lap pool in it and over the winter I decided I would start to use it... I also decided I didn't want my hair to be destroyed by the chlorine, so I bought a swimming cap. Christian can't let it go. So here is the 2008 Pregnant Women's Swimming Champion... (Baby's gonna be so proud of mommy and daddy some day).

Introducing... the full front panel!

I did it! I jumped over to the other side and purchased some maternity clothes... Christian came with and helped me pick out some cute stuff. I got a pair of jeans and a bunch of casual shirts, nothing too dressy since I really don't need dress clothes for work. The jeans are the best things since sliced bread. They have the full front panel that is so light and comfy over my belly; I can turn it down or leave it up. I LOVE them!! I wore street clothes to work today instead of scrubs. I thought I could get away with wearing my regular grey cords with one of the longer tops I purchased over the weekend... I should take a picture and post it. Ridiculous. I couldn't even zip them. So I think I'm going to pack up my skinny pants and just forget about them for at least the next 9 months instead of wasting my time trying to find a way to make them work. Anyway, I look forward to picking up a few more items to get me through the next couple of months; especially pants!

Last weekend Christian, my mom, and I went shopping for a friends baby shower gift and decided to pretend we were the three bears in the glider section of the store... We all agreed that this glider was "juusst right". The pillow on the back is soo soft and it is upholstered in chenille. It is a glider and even has a gliding ottoman. It is amazing. I told Christian we may want to have it upholstered in a color to match our family room; I'm not sure I can leave it up in the baby's room! We also found a crib set we liked, but we'll keep looking around for the perfect one.

Christian came to visit me at work today. We listened to baby's heartbeat together. Last week when I listened, I found the heartbeat all the way over toward the right side. Today when we listened it was all the way over to the left side. Sounds nice and strong! We look forward to our next appointment on the 28th so we can see how big baby is getting.

Thank you Kim and Logan for baby's first stuffed animal-so soft and cuddly!

At last... we are on to the second trimester!

Hooray!!! We have made it through the first trimester. Yesterday was a big day for us. I have been looking forward to August 2nd for a long time; I only have to take my shot once a day now. I've been giving myself shots in the bootie twice a day for about four months now. In addition, I was able to stop taking my oral prescription yesterday. Ahhhhh... now the next big day is August 16th when I have NO shots at all!! What a relief.

So the questions I'm being asked are "Do you feel any better?" and "Have you gotten some energy back?". Well, I certainly have been feeling better. The only times I get nauseated are if I wait too long to eat (which is back to a near normal schedule, not every 90 minutes!) or after I take my multivitamins. I can't change that. I take them at night, and I try to have something in my stomach before I take them, but they still get me every time. As far as more energy- yes I am less tired than a few weeks ago, but I still need a nap after work. And I've finally got it in me to study for my CNRN exam (to become certified in neuroscience nursing) so that's a great sign. I should have been studying for months now but these first few months left me feeling anything but interested in studying. My test is in October, so that will have me very busy 'till then.

Baby is about the size of a peach now. The intestines which have been growing inside the umbilical cord are now moving into their permanent position in the baby's abdomen. The muscles in the walls of the digestive tract are now functional so baby can begin "practicing" the movements required to push food from one portion of the tract to another. The baby's vocal cords are developing this week and the hard palate that divides the mouth from the nose is formed.

Active Baby!

This weekend we went camping with my Mom, Vince, Sandy, Shane, Branden, and our dogs. It was such a great time. Food was excellent, and the company was even better! We played games around the campfire, relaxed and played in Lake Michigan, and did a whole lot of laughing. Pacey and Riley even got to go swimming for the first time. Great memories!

We are just over 11 weeks pregnant. Today we got to hear baby's heartbeat for the first time via doppler, then we had another ultrasound and were again amazed at what we saw. Baby was kicking and waving its arms all over, and moving up and down and side to side in the amniotic fluid. It was so cute. The doctor was having a hard time getting baby's measurements; she kept saying "Oh my gosh, this is such an active baby! Slow down baby!". I'm sure at this rate baby will be exhausted by the time (he's) born, and just want to sleep all through the nights! (Haaah!) The heart rate was 162. The length matches up to a due date about 5 days earlier, so he's doing very well. Along with our doctor, we have decided to skip our next two week appointment and go back in four weeks for our next visit.

"Worth the Wait"

Wow- today was rough! I was SOOO tired at work and nauseated too. The best way I've heard this feeling explained is that it's like taking a sleeping pill when I wake up and then having to stay awake and work. I felt good all last week, with some nausea here and there and periods of sleepiness, but I was not taking naps after work. This week, I'm back to napping. The good news is that my cravings for junk food are not as strong. I've been craving fresh fruit and healthy sandwiches. Although, around lunch I'm still wanting veggie pizza. Today I had the most amazing grilled cheese ever! It had fresh tomato, mushroom, and bacon! YUM!

When I got home, I had such great surprises waiting! I got an adorable card from The Maryanski Family congratulating us. And then Christian went to the door and found two packages addressed to us also. The first was from Pam, a great pregnancy journal that details each days progress for mom and baby. It also gives some helpful hints and cute quotes. I love it! The other book I'm reading gives weekly updates and I always want to peek ahead, but this one will give me something to read every day- Thank you Pam!

The second gift is from Jessica and Kevin- the picture speaks for itself. When Christian pulled this out of the gift box, I struggled to hold back the tears; it just hit me! It says, "I was worth the wait". Oh, I cannot wait to see our baby in this adorable outfit! Thank you... I couldn't imagine any phrase more perfect!

Last week, Sue K. came back from Italy and brought baby a beautiful teal colored Rosary from Vatican City and a pendant. It is very special to us, and comes from a very special place. Thank you Sue and Ray for thinking of us while on vacation.

Tracy and Joe Volkmar were here this weekend to celebrate Dad's retirement. It was great to see them after so long and their adorable son Chase. Tracy's card said it best... "The best days of your lives are still to come". I have to believe she's right!

Knees and Elbows

So we met one of our new OB docs yesterday. He was great. He walked us through what to expect over the next months, explained tests, and was very reassuring. I have my next 3 appointments scheduled, each two weeks apart. During that time we will meet a few other doctors as well. By the end of the pregnancy, the hope is to have met each of them so when it comes time to deliver, we are familiar with each doctor. He gave very thorough explanations, and really took his time with us.

Baby has grown in two weeks from 1.4cm to 3.2cm, just under an inch and a half. That's what they call the CRL, crown-rump length. It is the measurement of babies head to butt, so we aren't counting the length of those itty-bitty legs. Actually, baby's length is a few days ahead of what was expected, so when it comes to growth we're doing really well. (Me and baby!!) The heart beat was just as beautiful as the first time we saw it. We're 10 weeks pregnant on Saturday. At ten weeks, baby is about the size of a prune. Bones and cartilage are forming and small indentations on the the legs are developing into knees and ankles. Unbelievably, the elbows on baby's arms are already working! Tiny buds of baby teeth are forming under the gums. The stomach is producing digestive juices, the kidneys are producing larger quantities of urine, and if it's a boy... the testes are producing testosterone.

We are thrilled to see baby is doing well, I'm feeling really good, and I look forward to getting some energy back. I'm still very tired, but the nausea has subsided greatly. Christian is so amazed that there is TWO heartbeats within one foot of each other- all within one body!

Thank you to Eric & Angela, Ron & Susan, Melissa, and Mom for your adorable cards. And thank you to each of you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. Everyone at work has been SO supportive- keeping an eye on me, and being so willing to help me with whatever I need. Thank you Julia for the "Got Milk" bib, and thank you mom for the baby sheet set too.

Baked goods and muffin-tops!

We've made it through two whole weeks without a doctor appointment! It's just a taste of what's to come. It was difficult at times since we're already used to checking in on baby at least once a week. Every time I start to feel good I get a little nervous, but then I get nauseated and exhausted, and I'm kindly reminded that baby is doing just fine. Tomorrow's a big day; it's our first appointment with our OB. I called yesterday to verify the time and address of my appointment, and learned that my OB-gyne who did all my preliminary tests, fertility drugs, intra-uterine inseminations, and my surgery back in November is no longer delivering at CDH. Everything happens for a reason though; I was just commenting to my mom that I was considering switching to another doctor within the same practice but felt Dr. Weeks knew me so well I should stick with him... Well, I don't have a choice anymore. The doctor I've chosen was one who during one of my intra-uterine inseminations last year insisted on giving me a shot of lidocaine into the cervix- his theory is "why should my patients be in any unnecessary pain?". Well, isn't that who I want to deliver my baby?! Yes! So I'm excited to see him again tomorrow. I'm more excited/anxious to check in on the baby and see that (he's) doing well.

So, I have a belly on me. I'm sure I can attribute a bit to the routine of eating every 90 minutes. This is the only thing I've found to keep the nausea controlled. The last 4 days or so have been much better for me. I've gained about 4.5 pounds so far with just over 2 weeks to go in the first trimester. We've taken pictures every week since week 5; it's funny to see the change- slight but definite. The old 'hair rubber band through the button hole and around the button' trick is keeping me in my regular clothes. Otherwise, I've got serious muffin-top going on with a hard time breathing in those tight pants, and sooo uncomfortable. Christian took me to Target, (big spenders we are) and we picked up some casual loose fitting tops. I got brave yesterday and threw on a long tank top with one of my not so old tops over it. OOOHHHHH NOOOOO she didn't!! Ripped that puppy right off and put on my new Target top! It was a sight. I know people are noticing my habits... today a patient brought in a huge assortment of fresh baked goods from their family bakery. Why did TWO co-workers march right over to let me know about "all the baked goods in the back room"?! (Love those cherry turn-overs).

I already have all my parts!

We had our last ultrasound at the fertility clinic today... My first appointment with our OB doc is on Wednesday July 16th. Baby's grown to just over 14mm, about 3/4ths of an inch. However, don't let that small size fool you! Baby has all the organs and body parts we do; they just need to develop more! The hands and feet are still slightly webbed, but in a few days they'll have developed into tiny fingers and toes.

In this picture, you can see the back view of the baby. The head is at the top, the spinal cord can be seen, and those round spots on the sides are the arms and legs!!! There's still a little tail but that will be gone by next week! The black area around the baby is the amniotic sac. All this in just under EIGHT WEEKS!

This last shot is a side view that shows where the umbilical cord attaches to the placenta. I think baby is waving hello to us! At first I thought my amazement came from this being OUR BABY, but this is just plain amazing no matter how I look at it. At less than an inch, my baby has arms and legs, hands and feet, a beating heart, eyes, lungs, kidneys... and so smart (he) already knows how to wave! WOW! Oh, and I should mention, we are not going to find out the sex of our baby until birth. I've been asked that a lot.

We sure love our rice!!!

This is Christian at six weeks! On Saturday we took the first picture of my belly- just a bit bloated for now. Baby Tolentino also had another photo shoot today. Now baby's crown to rump length is 8.2mm; that's 6mm bigger than last week. Yes, about the size of a piece of rice!!! The growth rate is about 1mm per day for now and (his) heart rate is 118 beats per minute. Still so absolutely amazing. On Sunday, I started to have some nausea which I thought was just anxiety. We were at Ashley and Andrew's graduation party, and it was so difficult to keep such an exciting secret! But when I woke up on Monday, I struggled to get ready for work and stuck a big ziplock in my pocket just in case I couldn't make it through the car ride. Bring on the saltines... the nausea has begun! I still felt the same ALL DAY on Tuesday, but today I feel great. No nausea, but I managed to sneak in a 3 hour nap after meeting Grandma Liz for lunch. We went browsing for clothes and I had more fun looking through the baby section than looking for clothes for myself. Ohhhh, how exciting! Now Lola Rosie is here visiting us. We've gotten our first few baby gifts already from a few of my co-workers. Chris got us an adorable soft little angel rattle, and Linda gave us our first baby healthcare kit- the perfect gift from one nurse to another. Thank you!

Truly a Miracle

On Wednesday, June 18th, we had our first appointment to confirm a healthy pregnancy. We were so nervous! All that excitement had suddenly escaped us and we were just plain nervous! We would find out today how many babies and make sure the pregnancy was in the uterus. Every thought was racing through our heads! When the picture showed up on the ultrasound screen, she confirmed we had one baby in the uterus. Relief came over us again as we filled with a whole new set of emotions. Christian and I were holding on to each others hand as she explained what we were looking at; the gestational sac, the yolk, and the fetus! Then I saw the most beautiful thing in my whole world... she zoomed in on the fetus, and there it was. My baby has a beating heart!!! Words again escaped us, but Christian said his happiest moment was looking at me watching the screen as a big smile came upon my face. This is the ultrasound picture from that day at 5.5 wks pregnant. The arrow is pointing to the fetus. What a cutie patootie!

Can you play that message again?

Well, the short story goes...
We started preparing for our second embryo transfer back in late March. On Wednesday May 28th, we went to our clinic, where they had already thawed two embryos for transfer. At 9:30am with a full bladder... no- a bursting bladder... the transfer took place. The next 12 days would be some of the longest yet. The first few days were manageable, I was on bed rest, and filled with hope. By day 8, I was DONE. I was angry, sad, frustrated, and anxious. By Friday, I had been rejuvenated by my mom who reminded me to take it one day at a time instead of focusing on how the heck I was gonna make it to Monday morning for our test results.(This picture was taken on Friday, June 6th at Ryan Inlow's wedding). Monday morning came, Christian and I went for my blood work, and then came home and took a nap. I found great happiness in sleep during this 12 day period- anything to make time pass. He went to work and came home at 1:15pm with lunch. We have a voicemail set up at our doctors office where we can check in for updates on medication dosages, lab results, etc. He asked me to check the messages, but there were no new ones. We ate. Then checked again. Nothing. Then again. And again. I told him I wouldn't check any more, cause I was going CRAZY!! We had to wait at least a half hour before I'd check again. At 2:34pm we called again and this time heard, "One New Voicemail"!!!!!!!! We sat on the couch together with our insides flipped inside out and upside down in anticipation. When I heard the nurses voice, I was sure the news wasn't good. Her voice was soft and gentle; like she was about to give us difficult news. And then she said the words we'll never forget..."Congratulations!! You're pregnant!!" The rest of a message was a blur- something about a future appointment, meds to continue, and considering an OB doc... blah blah blah. Our mouths hung open with no words coming out. Just tears in our eyes as we stared at each other. Christian said, "Uhhhh... Can you play that message again, so I can here the part where she says you're pregnant?!" Once we heard it the second time, we just cried and cried, and hugged, and cried. Ahhhhh. No words can explain the pressure relieved from my body. I just began to giggle.

What were we waiting for??!!

Our journey really began all the way back in October of 2005. After about 6 months of "trying", we decided to consider some fertility testing. Another 6 months went by before we decided to move forward with Dr. Peter Weeks. If my dad heard me say to someone, "Yeah, we've been trying for about a year; it gets frustrating", he would say "Trying...They're Trying... Geez, quit complaining! You know how much I wish mom and I were TRYING??!!". He's good for lightening up a situation.Time went on, and one fertility procedure would lead us to the next, and we had our ups and we had our downs. When I was feeling sad, Christian would pick me up and the opposite was also true. When all else had failed, and another year had passed, Dr. Weeks recommended us to see a fertility expert. We met Dr. Michael Zinger who reviewed our medical history and suggested we consider In Vitro Fertilization as our next step. We were anxious about this, as it seemed like the last resort for us to conceive together, and it was difficult to hear that this was our best option- already. We thought about it, and knowing how badly we wanted to be parents together, there really was no doubt we would take this step. After a few months of ovary stimulating medications, I went in for an egg retrieval on October 20, 2007. They took 20 eggs (I felt like a hen). In the end 5 of them accepted fertilization (yes- half me, half Christian!) and survived 5 days of observation in the lab. On October 25th, they brought me back and transferred 2 embryos back into me and froze the other 3. That's when things became complicated for us. After some more ups and downs, and some unfortunate events, we decided to take some time off to heal- both physically and emotionally.